The Road to Nowhere Leads Everywhere: Tales from the Lands of Arlington Green

By: Stephan B. Allen

Foregoing her usual opening in an attempt to control the middle of the board with her pawn, it was the Queen’s Knight with which she made her first move; I glanced up from the board to see a smug smile upon her face, as if she were expecting some confusion on my part due to her change of tactics. Nodding my head slightly, I did not comment upon the unusual move on her part. Moving my gaze back to the board, I casually asked, “My lady, do you know why the only piece which can open a game besides a pawn is the Knight?” Caught by surprise at my question, though she maintained her air of superiority, she eventually replied, “I believe it is due to being capable of jumping the pawn, Mr. Ainsley.” Placing my hand upon the piece she assumed I would use for my opening move, I turned my attention away from the board to once again gaze upon her face. While changing to another piece entirely to make a play, I answered matter-of-factly, “Actually, that move is allowed by the rules, My Lady. I should have thought you would have been aware of what those were-my mistake.”

Ever wonder what a smug expression looks like when it virtually melts off someone’s face? Play chess with me sometime and find out.