Here are the football results: League Division Fun Manchester United won, Manchester City lost. Crystal Palace 2, Buckingham Palace 1 Millwall Leeds nowhere Wolves 8. A cheese roll and had a cup of tea 2 Newcastle's Heaven Sunderland's a very nice place 2 Ipswhich one? You tell me.

Football, first love, teachers and tongue-twistersâ?¬¿. This is a fantastic poetry collection by two of the funniest, most famous poets writing today.