A fancy, highfalutin Italian word that just means "song," used by opera and other classical music types to try to impress other opera and other classical music types (such music being essentially nothing more than a glorified form of one upmanship anyway). Artistic grants Huge sums of money given at the drop of a hat for useless musical endeavors. They are always given to other musicians. Arts council The living embodiment of Murphy's Law ("If something can go wrong, it will") and the paramount example of Man's inhumanity to Man.